I'm typing this, awkwardly & one-handed knowing that I am now 30 days away from leaving for my adventure. As my best friend, and all of my immediate & not-so immediate family can attest I am a pretty serious planner & organiser. As always seems to happen with me I thought I knew pretty much how these last few weeks before I leave were going to go. I would work, & probably even if I didn't intend it I was fairly confident that I would have begun resenting being there & not planning my trip or - even better already gone. I thought that I would be spending as much time as possible with my family, with our dog, exercising (to fulfil my lifelong fantasy of my legs looking amazing in that pair of jeans) & on my few weekends off I would be spending with friends - both those I see often & those I never seem to have enough time to spend with. As per usual for me, best laid plans and all that, this isn't how it has been happening. Don't get me wrong some of it is happening. The family dog & I have spent so much quality time together these last couple of weeks that I fear we are both becoming codependent. So much quality time that I'm having a hard time imagining leaving HER. Unfortunately for both of us however we haven't spent any of the past couple of weeks with us taking long blissful walks & exercising. As seems the norm for me with the plans that I make - whether in my head or on paper - they seem to have the best time unravelling. I can only hope that in this instance they don't dissolve too much.
I guess I should briefly explain what is going on right now with me that has caused this change of plans. A couple of weeks ago i was walking down the carpeted stairs in our house, wearing my slippers. One moment I was at the top about to head downstairs & the next I was half way down the stairs on my butt, with the hand that I'd thrown up to stop myself twisted up behind me. The most typically "me" part of the whole situation is that I stood up, finished walking down the stairs & brushed the whole thing off to my my mom who was obviously concerned for me. I even laughingly said something along the lines of "that's gonna hurt". Note to self on this crazy adventure of life - YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS IS ALMOST ALWAYS RIGHT!. On this occasion I didn't listen to the voice in my head & went to work the next morning, did my job and lifted books for the better part of the day. The next morning when I couldn't even get out of bed I had to admit that I couldn't just wish this away. Several doctors appointments & x-ray & ultrasounds later it was confirmed that I have a torn rotator cuff in my right shoulder. Ugh.
Now all this has left me more than slightly stressed. I'm a worry-wart anyway but now knowing that I have no other option but to take things slow & do what I'm told. I can't rush my recovery - much as I tried to do the first couple of days - I just have to sit back & do what the doctor orders. In case you're wondering, that's basically nothing, no driving, no work, no lifting, pretty much no use of my right arm. One of the only upsides is that my inner fangirl is feeling pretty contented with the amount of TV that I've been watching.
Now as to what this means for the trip that I leave on in less than a month - in fact as I'm writing this it is basically one month EXACTLY from when I am scheduled to be touching down in Seattle. So far I haven't changed the travel portion of the plans & I don't intend to change the plans until someone comes out & says to me "No, you can't go" I haven't heard that so as far as I'm concerned it is still all go. I may not be as ready for the trip as I'd planned but I still determined that I'm going to get there. Something I think I proved pretty early on in my life is that when I decide I'm doing something it gets done!! In the immediate future, I see the doctor again tomorrow & in the meantime I will remain sat back, trying not to do anything I shouldn't. Continue my Sons of Anarchy marathon perhaps - and keep hoping for the best!!
